Kristi Holmesfeeding the writer's soul

Unexpected Twists and Turns

§ March 20th, 2012 § Filed under Creativity, Personal, Writing § 3 Comments

Since I last wrote, which was shamefully long ago, lots of things have happened. Interesting things. Scary things. Exciting things. A few months ago, I was happily ensconced in my routine as a mom/aspiring author, trying to balance family responsibilities with my creative work and trying to grow my freelance editing business as well. And now I find myself working at my husband’s startup (which I would love to plug, but that would shred any semblance of an autonomous authorial self that I have going here) and still balancing the same family responsibilities and personal aspirations. Writing is pretty much on the back burner, unless it’s FAQs or soothing emails to cranky customers — which turns out to be something I’m actually quite good at. This is one of those times in life when you just have to hunker down and do the right thing and hope to come out the other side intact.

I did manage to squeeze in a one-day writing workshop with Andre Dubus, who is brilliant and funny and inspiring. I loved House of Sand and Fog (although it broke my heart), and his memoir Townie is truly one of the best memoirs I’ve ever read. Its insights into fathers, sons, violence, class and writing are stunning. Dubus shared the story of how he wrote the first draft of House of Sand and Fog – fifteen minutes or a bit longer at a time, sitting in his car in a cemetery after work but before going home to his wife and young children. Which makes me think that maybe squeezing the writing into the nooks and crannies of the day isn’t such a bad thing after all, if you just keep plugging away at it.

My blogging friend, Dad who Writes, another writer balancing family and writing and work, wrote a wistful post about getting older, figuring out how to be a grown-up (or not figuring it out) and wondering if you’re ever going to do what you wanted to do with your life. I don’t have answers, but I am so in that same headspace at the moment. My children will be grown in just a few short years, and I’ll only be 49 — so many years left to keep writing!

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Yes I Am Alive

§ January 4th, 2012 § Filed under Creativity, Personal, Writing § 6 Comments

HI!!!

*enthusiastic waving*

I’m still here, still swamped, still finding my voice and working through a few things. I thought you all might enjoy this article:

10 Things Children Don’t Say to Writers

I think #5 is my favorite.

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Doing Work You Love

§ September 14th, 2011 § Filed under Creativity, Personal, Writing § 7 Comments

I’ve been a faithful reader of Susan Cain’s blog, “Quiet: The Power of Introverts” for some time now (Cain has a book coming out soon). As an introvert myself, I’m fascinated with work that explores the ways in which introverts experience and cope with the world.

Cain’s post today really resonated with me. She posits that introverts might become so used to conforming to extroverted norms that they choose careers that don’t really mesh with their introverted qualities. (I considered becoming a journalist, but figured out soon enough that I simply would not be able, on a daily basis, to approach strangers and ask them questions!) In today’s post, she posed four questions to help introverts (and others) figure out what career path might be best for them. The questions are:

1. What or whom do you envy?
2. What did you love to do when you were a child?
3. What work do you gravitate to, even when it’s unpaid or unnecessary?
4. What makes you cry?

These questions suggest that a career is something that you are drawn towards, or maybe even called to, rather than something that is a rational, deliberate choice. I think my mistake in my early 20′s was thinking that I could “choose” a career, and force myself into an externally defined profession; ultimately that didn’t work for me. In the end, I find I can only do what I am drawn to do: to write, to teach, and to use my skills to help others whenever possible. Those are the things I find myself doing over and over, even when I’ve sworn not to! I seem to be constitutionally incapable of fitting into someone else’s corporate or institutional structure (or perhaps I should say, I am lucky enough that I have been able to survive without doing so).

Of course, many career choices are made out of pragmatic or economic concerns, and it is probably only the privileged who can choose based on affinity. But it’s worth considering, at turning points in our lives or times of reassessment, whether our career paths resonate with who we truly are.

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